Listening is key in Obedience!
I was sitting in a quiet place waiting to hear from God. When the word "Listen" came to me. Which made me write it down. Then I began to think what is the difference between hearing and listening. Just so you know the difference is huge.
When a person says I hear you, they are saying that I hear your voice. I hear the vibrations of your voice and I know that you believe what you are saying deserves my attention. Hearing means I may or may not be giving you my undivided attention. Hearing means that I may be formulating what it is I want to say back to you. Hearing means you have been heard but not truly acknowledged.
Now when someone says, I'm listening to you, well they are not just hearing your voice but they have decided to really hear. They hear you with their eyes. They notice facial expressions, breathing patterns, body language and the tones in your voice. How it fluctuates up and down, how it trembles. They sense your excitement, sadness, anger and etc... they can identify with each word and their attention is focused on what you are saying and if necessary they can repeat it word for word with the same intensity. They have listened to you.
Now some would say the opposite is true, Listen is surface and hearing is a more deeper experience. But as the Lord spoke to me. I listened.
When God finished speaking, I found myself still focusing on what He had said to me. I could not respond I had to let his words sink in. It was not a rebuke or something very profound. His words were healing me, restoring me and causing my mind to be renewed. His word were life to me and I did not want to lose their meaning in my own words and voice.
The journey continues...
You are Bound No More.
Pastor Linda Hillman
(c) 2015 LAH Ministries International
Booklindahillman@gmail.com
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Will You Be Made Whole
In The Meantime
Today, I am dealing with paperwork for my starting my church in San Francisco. Many times I go back and forth with God about this. This is a very demanding time to start a church. However, I don't question God anymore if I am the right one to do it or if I am going to the right city. Many years ago, God told me He would give me a message for the SF. He also told people that people are in the streets waiting for me. Well not for me but for the message He has given me.
But the legal portion of starting a legitimate church in alignment with my organization guidelines and the state of California is taxing. Because really at the end of the day I must obey God. but in this world of religious freedoms being questioned by the government and same-sex marriages, and tolerance of sin being slapped on with a vengeance. I have to stay prayed up. I have to have my mind right. I can't move forward in fear that someone will target my church or ministry because of what the Devil has put into place.
I feel most times I am alone, that no one can help me. But then at the same time I feel God leading me. There are some guidelines that I feel are necessary others I feel that are standing in the way of me moving forward. However, God is able to make a way out of no way and cause the hearts of men and women to change. So, I trust Him to do what is needed at the end of the day. All I can do is pray, seek his wisdom and move forward as He leads.
I am actively looking for a permanent place to worship. So the Bible Studies and prayer meeting can be consistent. That the people God has assigned to New Life can find it and start to live the way God intended for them to live. So we all can be pleasing in His sight and obedient to His word.
Please pray for me as I continue to walk in the Spirit and not in my flesh. Obeying God, growing in favor with God and man.
You are Bound No More.
Pastor Linda Hillman
(c) 2015 LAH Ministries International
Booklindahillman@gmail.com
Get Your Copy Now
Will You Be Made Whole
In The Meantime
I will bless the Lord today. I will speak of His goodness. I will not be swayed by what I see. What my heart tells me is true can only be misleading. I will not give in, I will not give up. God created me to be exactly who and what I am. I will to obey Him in everything. I choose to be obedient. His will not my will.
Yesterday we Celebrated July 4th, it was a day of independence. Even though Independence Day is a national holiday that really has nothing to do with being spiritual or a Christian to me it did. I realized that my independence was setting a course that would forever change my life because of my obedience.
When I really think about being free it means obeying God no matter what. Following his lead and understanding that He is in control. Then and only then can I be truly and ultimately free!
The journey continues...
You are Bound No More.
Pastor Linda Hillman
(c) 2015 LAH Ministries International
Booklindahillman@gmail.com
Get Your Copy Now
Will You Be Made Whole
In The Meantime
Today, I was in morning worship...For me, morning worship is just expressing how much I love, adore and want to please God because of who He is to me. It starts with thanksgiving. I thank him for all the wonderful things He has done. It so amazing how I start to thank Him and even the minute things come to my mind (ie. that breeze across my face when I was sitting in the sun, hot and sweaty). As I begin to thank Him, I start to praise Him for what He has done and then it is like a moth to fire, I begin to worship Him for who He is. No longer am I just grateful but I evolve. I can't express it in words. I transcend beyond, my circumstance of what I don't have or even what I do...
I realize most of the "revelations" that I am focusing on are not new, but things I have known. Things I have tried to minimize or skirt around. So God is just good in that he has not cut me off or thrown me out. I think Aladrian said it best, this is a time to get better acquainted with God and to understand my relationship with Him.
I entered this journey thinking it would bring NEW revelation to me...what it has done is confirmed what God has already said. So I resolve to work on those things with a vengeance now. Another thing that God has shown me, in this, is I need those that can help me to help me. I can not do all that God has given me by myself. Now, I am praying that God send those that are to partner with me in this journey and that we walk together in unity. I ask that you help me pray also.
I have wasted so much time dealing with the fear of being rejected, fear of failure and the fear of success, that I have forgotten it is not about me at all. It's all about what God wants to do through me and in me.
The Journey Continues...
You are Bound No More.
Pastor Linda Hillman
(c) 2015 LAH Ministries International
Booklinda@gmail.com
Get Your Copy Now
Will You Be Made Whole
In The Meantime
Well, It seems that Linda (my flesh) still likes to rise when it comes to total obedience. I have had a few hard lessons in obedience during this process. Understanding that even the little things need to be obeyed to the letter. I am reminded of so many promises I have made to God in order to be relieved of some plaguing thing. For example, "God if you get me out of this mess, I promise to do what you want me to do without hesitation." Then, it happens and several years later God comes to collect and I hesitate or worse, I don't do it at all.
As these things come up I am repenting for it but, more than that, I am asking God to help me change my behaviors. I mean, really you can't bargain with an all-powerful God who knows and sees everything. I am silly to even think that I could.
The great thing is God is showing me this bad little habit so I can work on me. Well, really He can work on me. So now being committed to the things He has spoken is even more important to me. Changing bad habits and replacing them with committed, focused, determined habits is the key.
I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me...that is the mindset I will have from this day forward. I am changing my "I can't" attitude to I can, as Tanya White would say. No more excuses and no more silly laden promises. Just commitment to do the obedient thing.
Father God, I repent for the times I lied to you. I ask for your forgiveness for the wasted years, months, days, hours and moments. I ask that you help me turn from my sins and walk in newness of life. I would that I be found pleasing in your sight. It is my desire to see you in heaven. It is my desire to see your face in peace. Knowing that while here on earth I did everything you asked of me and I touched and inspired my generation to do the same. Father, I ask that you cleanse me, purge me of my own selfishness. I want to walk as you would have me to walk. Let me not be distracted by my flesh, by Satan, by people or any other thing or spirit that would raise itself against the knowledge of what you want for me. Your word says, If I love you I will keep your commandments. That is what I want to do more than anything, to keep your commandments and to walk worthy of the calling you placed on my life. I ask that you, Father, rebuke the devour, in Jesus name. Amen
The journey continues...
You are Bound No More.
Pastor Linda Hillman
(c) 2015 LAH Ministries International
Booklinda@gmail.com
Get Your Copy Now
Will You Be Made Whole
In The Meantime
Well, today was a struggle for me. Not only did I struggle with making a schedule for my writing. I have been frustrated with the whole nine yards. I keep questioning God about if I am the right one to be transparent about events in my life and if what He is teaching me is something others want to know or read. Again, I was reminded it's not about my comfort zone. I read somewhere that all the things I have been through were not only ordained and allowed by God, but He was very much in control. It was so that God got all the glory and my flesh got NONE. I understand this but does it make me feel good about it. No.
Sometimes, I wish I could go deeper, say things more profound. touch the very inner core of those listening and reading my words. However, I am me and God loves me just as I am. As shallow as I may be at times, and this makes me cry tears of joy. Just to think that the God who spoke this world into existence, stops to listen to my prayers, to answer when I call, to give instructions, to guide, to lead, to love, to rebuke, to encourage, to discipline, and on it goes. Why wouldn't I want to give back my life for this limited time I have.
So I cry, I cry and I cry. Lord, I want to be pleasing in your sight, I want to do what you want me to do, my spirit is so willing, my flesh so weak. Please make me a vessel of honor and not dishonor. Mold me and make me after they will. This is not a cliche for me, but it's my honest prayer.
Back to my schedule of writing, I feel 2 hours a day is a good thing but when? I ask that you pray for me to remove the obstacles that I have to overcome to get this done. It's not as easy as it looks. It's not that I don't have the desire to do it. The desire burns deep within me. I have to want to, got to and will to. My struggle is with all that I am doing, will I feel guilty about sitting in a quiet place and writing when other things are pressing for my attention also. I am a creature of bad habits, hangups and hurts. However, I am learning that trusting God is the only way to live.
You see it is like God has asked me to go from point A to point B. I have made the necessary steps to start the journey, but I am in reverse instead of drive. So if delayed obedience is disobedience then what is misguided understanding. I mean I am doing something, but I am not doing what the Lord has asked me to do completely. Help me Jesus. I celebrate what I am doing well. I applaud myself for taking the journey, but I have to remember clarity is what is needed.
Thus, I cry tears of Joy? Why tears of Joy? Well, the very understanding that I am a wretch undone means there is still hope for me to change and change I will!
My journey will and must continue...
You are Bound No More.
Pastor Linda Hillman
(c) 2015 LAH Ministries International
Booklindahillman@gmail.com
Get Your Copy Now
Will You Be Made Whole
In The Meantime
See in the beginning of the 21 days of concentrated obedience I knew that I was suppose to focus on the things God had placed in me. I was supposed to focus on my diet and making this temple the best that it can be for Christ. Well, I did the later but the former, Well, let's just say I dropped the ball totally. I forgot to remember the dream, the commission, the passion.
Over the past eight days, I have not written or rewritten very little of my book. I really have not written anything but the notes for the days of concentrated obedience.
Lately, I have been feeling unfulfilled. Why? Well, now I know, I have not been actively doing everything that God has asked me to do. I have picked through his desires for me and choose the ones that made me feel comfortable, a few that didn't. I have been focused on me and not His heart.
I have used excuses to make me feel better about me but would not look to see the disappointed look on His face. So this journey has opened me up for God to show me the ugly truth. He has been good to me and faithful, but I have not been good or faithful to Him. I have a desire to hear those words but until this journey, did I realize that the words, "Well done, thy good and faithful servant", were drifting away from me. Not because, I am blatantly disobeying God but because I am too afraid to step out and truly believe God for the impossible. Is that the same things? It is not easy to trust God to be a way maker when standing in front of a ten-foot tall brick wall, but He is way-maker. So I resolve to trust Him, even faced with the impossibility of the dreams He has placed with me. His passion and desire for His daughter. He knows what he is doing and If I can trust Him, so will I.
The journey continues...
So, Lord I surrender my will to you and I will do as You say do.
You are Bound No More.
Pastor Linda Hillman
(c) 2015 LAH Ministries International
Booklindahillman@gmail.com
Get Your Copy Now
Will You Be Made Whole
In The Meantime
