Defining Church Hurt

There is a term that floats around in the Christian arena...it is called Church Hurt. What exactly is church hurt? well, I am glad you asked this questions because it has several answers. However, for the purpose of this ministry and blog Church hurt is defined in this manner:

Church hurt is all offenses that take place in church while doing ministry by other Christians, saints, and especially the clergy. So in other words, if you have been in church and things have happened to you or those you are concerned about that left a bitterness in your heart, maybe even caused you to leave a church to attend another, or even worst you stop going to church altogether. I asked that you know this is a safe haven for you. You can tell the story, no one will belittle you or make you feel like your feelings don't matter. However, understand this, this is a place of healing so we will help you work through the pain, anger, bitterness and unforgiving to get you to a place where you can begin to breathe again. It's our desire to get you to a place of healing and restoration.

No it does not mean that you will have to go back to the church you left but you will have to forgive them and release them and yourself from the jail that you have built. It means you will have to trust again. You will have to open yourself up again.  I know now it seems like you cant, but through the testimonies of others and my testimony I know you will see how it is possible to live in forgiveness.

So, just give this ministry a try...I know you will see that we care you and your soul and we truly want you to live in freedom.

You are Bound No More. 

Pastor Linda Hillman 

God Can Heal Your Wounds

The real question is will we let God heal us? 

A lot of us have difficulty in relating to others because of hurts in our lives. These affects the way we communicate and also the way we handle ourselves. This is one reason why we intentionally or intentionally hurt others. Not until we are healed from our pains, we  will always have difficulty in facing life. God's desire and will is to heal us from our hurts as part of His plan in restoring us. However, we must be willing to let Him work in our life.

Life's Realities ...

• Wounds in our heart take place when we allow Sin, Unresolved Past, Unforgiveness, discouragement , Feelings of Rejection control our lives. Hurts in our hearts will be revealed during conflicts in relationship and times of crisis.
• Jesus is near to the brokenhearted. He understands our pain. He is willing and able to heal and restore us.
• A healed heart will always result to a contented and joyful life. It makes us generous in every area of our lives. It enables us to handle conflicts in relationships properly.
• There is a connection between a healed heart and a positive attitude ( Proverbs 17:22 ).
• God has provided for our healing but we still have a choice if want it or not. If we decide to be restored then we must be willing to let Him have it His way.

Steps to Freedom our damaged emotions

A. Receive comfort from God by surrendering our hurts to Him.
( Matthew 11:28; 1 Peter 5:7 )
B. Confront your past with God's Forgiveness .
(Isaiah 1:18; Matthew 18:21-35; Acts 3:19; 2 Corinthians 7:10)
C. Refuse to believe that you are product of your past experiences.
(Proverbs 24:16; Philippians 3:13-14)
D. Focus on your identity in Christ and build on it..
(Philippians 3:13-14; 4:13)
E. Choose not to be hurt when you are
offended by receiving and walking in the love of God.
( 1 Thessalonians 5:11; James 5:16 )

You are Bound No More. 

Pastor Linda Hillman 
(c) 2015 Living Above Hurt Ministries

Why or How Come?

“What does not take me out, makes me stronger.” 

Many of us say the phrase after we have come out of a trial or hardship. We tend to get a sense of empowerment from this statement. The real question here is do we truly believe this statement. Is this just one of those statement that sounds good after a period of stressful situations. What if you are still in the midst of your dilemma, can you say this phrase? Can you claim the triumph even then? Do you ask “Why” me, why did I have to suffer? Do you harbor bitterness and unforgiveness?

You see many of us are so preoccupied with the “WHY” something happen that we may never get to the “HOW COME”. With that said, the question becomes, “How come this occurred and what am I suppose to learn? Exploring this can be daunting, so here are a few tips.

You need to ask yourself what is my pain. A doctor prescribes medication because of the symptoms the patient says they are experiencing. More simply put, when you go to the doctor with a pain in your stomach, you describe it to the doctor and he does an examination. With the information you have given him and what he finds through his examination, he then prescribes a medication regiment that will allow healing to occur. Now, it is understandable that the medication itself does not heal the body but what it does do is cause the pain to subside. In the absence of your discomfort, your body can then heal itself. What a concept, the medical profession has taught us to get rid of the pain so the process of healing can happen. If you ask yourself this question, do not use other words like what is the problem or who is my problem. Stay focused on you. Moving from what is my pain to what is the problem, you are minimizing your discomfort. It is like taking an Advil for a toothache. You may feel okay for a while but eventually the pain is going to come back because you have not dealt with the real issue and no healing is occurring.

Knowing what your pain is will lead to, “Why am I stuck?” Many will try to brush past this. If you have ever had an open wound, you know that it must heal from the inside out. This process can take a while and if you are not careful, the skin will begin to close on the surface but the wound is not total healed underneath. When this occurs, you have to reopen the wound to allow the healing to take place correctly. The same is true for inner healing. You must allow the inside to be healed before it will show on the surface. No facades that will hide the festering boil underneath. Being stuck in a rut and not understanding why things happened, can only lead to repetitious behaviors. These behaviors will keep you living in misery and regret, making one bad decision after another because you have not learned how to avoid it.

This is when you have to define the how come. The “how come” is logical reasoning. The “how come” will bring the change in your behavior you have been looking for. It will help you learn the lesson life was teaching you. For instance, maybe you were in that bad situation because you needed to learn self worth. The “how come” only comes with clarity of vision and after you probe deep inside yourself.


You are Bound No More. 

 Pastor Linda Hillman 
(c) 2015 Living Above Hurt Ministries 

Healing the Hurts

Here's a lesson from a recent Women's Conference I attended. Be blessed with this one.

• Emotional Abuse
• Christian wounds
• Hurt in the church
• Domestic Violence
• Harboring negative feelings
• holding grudges. it hurts ourselves more than others

Someone once said that holding a grudge is like drinking poison and hoping that it will hurt the other person. But yet many of us do it and cant see that we are really killing ourselves.

You can choose to hurt or Heal

You can choose your happiness or sadness in life. One way to do this when you choose whether to continue to nurse a hurt you have received in life, or to heal yourself and you relationship with the person that hurt you.

In reaction to our emotional hurts we often erect protective structures to avoid dealing with them or allowing anyone to touch them. Over time these structures become comfortable. Before we cna heal the hurt, these structures must be acknowledged and dealt with. this will often mean honestly facing our pain and anger and resentment choosing to forgive, YES forgive those who have wounded us instead of resenting them, and determining to risk opening our hearts to others again. It also generally involves a slow and difficult process not a quick fix. Like peeling an onion, it usually happens one tearful layer at a time.

Definition

A wounded heart occurs when someone or something brings hurt to your emotions. "The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they fo down into the innermost parts of the belly." Proverbs 26:22.

Sources of Hurts

1. Result of Offense brought to us from others People say things or do things to hurt us. Prov 18:8
2. Result from our won sinful behavior. Not all hurts come from without. sometimes they can be the enemy within. Prov 17:19, Psalms 25:18 II Sam 24:10
3. Result from a calamity where one is overcome by the experience. Job 3:25-26
4. Result from the sins of forefathers (ancestors) Exodus 34:6-7
5. Result from drug and alcohol use. Proverbs 23:29-35
6. results from occult involvement Leviticus 20:6

God's Provision

1. God cares about your broken heart. Ps 34:18, 51:17
2. God healed David's heart and He will also heal yours. Ps 147:3, Heb 13:8
3. Jesus was sent to heal the broken hearted. Luke 4:18
4. Jesus, Himself, suffered all the hurts that one could suffer. Isa 53:1-12, John 1:11. Luke 22:57, 23:35-37, Matthew 27:46
5. Through the suffering of Jesus, God has provided the healing for your hurts. Isa 53:5
6. It is God's desire to heal your hurts. I Peter 5:7
7. God must have control of your whole heart before He can heal it. Jeremiah 29:13, Rev 3:20

Steps of Preparation

1. You must give your heart to Jesus letting Him become your lord. Roman 10:9, Phil 2:9-10
2. If you have offended someone else, then you must confess your offense and ask them to forgive you. Matthew 5:23-24, I Peter 3:16
3. You must forgive (RELEASE) the person who has hurt you. Matt 6:12, 14-15
4. You must put their judgement into God's hands and then ask God to forgive them for their offense toward you. Luke 23:24, Acts 7:60
5. You must yield your rights to God (possessions, respect, honor, family, expectations). Matt 19:21, I Peter 5:5-6, Luke 18:20, Mark 8:34-37, Psa 119:165

WARNING: A wounded heat that does not receive healing is an open door for evil spirits. Esp 4:26-27, I Peter 5:8, Genesis 4:4-7, Matt 18:21-35

How to Receive Healing

1. Make a list of your hurts (begin with the greatest list)
2. Ask God to cleanse your heart of all wrong attitudes (anger, bitterness, resentment, unforgiveness, lust, hate, revenge). Isa 1:18, 51:10, I John 1:9
3. Picture your experience ob being hurt in your mind
4. Now picture Jesus suffering the same hurt for you and overcoming it by his own death and resurrection. I Peter 2:24
5. Next picture in your mind the resurrected Jesus offering healing to you. Luke 4:18-19
6. In faith ASK God to heal your heart in the name of Jesus. Ezekiel 36:26, John 16:23.

As God heals your hurts, He will also give you a tender heart that will be sensitive to the hurts of others. Ezekiel 36:26, II Cor 5:18, Mark 5:19

Remember: God can change that which was meant for evil into good. Genesis 50:20, Duet 23:5 Romans 8:28, I Peter 5:8-10 and II Cor 1:6